A woman’s misperception about why her male partner isn’t functioning sexually can lead to serious relationship issues and a progressively worsening sex life. Lack of love is usually not the problem. In most cases, men’s sexual health issues have physical causes. Certain diseases can affect blood flow to the penis. Certain medications such as antidepressants or blood pressure medicines can cause sexual dysfunction. Premature ejaculation, the most common sexual dysfunction with men, is not related to a lack of love for one’s mate.
More than one in four men climax too quickly, a professor of sociology at the University of Chicago, who published a 1999 landmark article in JAMA (The Journal of the American Medical Association) on the prevalence of Mens Health Clinic.Reported that for men ages 18 to 59, a lack of interest in sex occurs in about 14 percent, an inability to achieve orgasm in about 7 to 8 percent, an absence of pleasure from sex in about 9 percent, and performance anxiety in about 17 percent.
So, given the statistics, what can women do?
“The first thing women need to do is to reassure their partners that they understand that this could be a physical problem and want to help.” This is no time for threats. I find that partners who do the best are the ones who say: “I’m worried about your health”. “Yes, I miss it and know you miss it, but more importantly, I’m worried about your health. I want to make sure it’s OK because I love you.” Women in these situations should try to step back and together understand what’s going on – not in a way that personalizes it. Try not to get overly anxious and upset.., and then gradually get more comfortable with being sexual.
Once women realize that their partners might have health issues, they can focus on being concerned. A woman’s nudging to seek medical help can be a lifesaver, an advanced practice urology clinical nurse specialist at Northwestern Memorial Hospital. “It’s really important that women encourage their men to have a regular physical exam because there are a myriad of physical things that can cause problems with sexual health,”
A good dose of loving communication is also key. “Intimacy is communication on the deepest, most profound level,” he adds. “If you’re not talking to each other, you’re never going to be able to achieve intimacy.”
There are many options that can successfully treat all types of sexual dysfunction. The earlier that people seek treatment, the sooner they can be helped, the experts agree. Depending on the problem and its extent, there are psychological and behavioral interventions, medications, injections and even penile implant surgery. We just have to figure out what fix is right for you and whether you want to do that fix.
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